Alright, one of the more challenging things to get a hold on since school started is maintaining hobbies or my creative outlets. I have learned about myself that I perform far better academically when I am stimulated artistically. It doesn’t have to be everyday, but it is crucial to my sanity (like being outside, equally crucial). I enjoy many forms , but the point is I needed SOMETHING. It was far easier to incorporate this during anatomy, the first block/course of the year. I sketched for every unit, every system nearly. Anything I wanted and needed to view on a larger scale , I drew, colored, and used to study. It was the perfect combination of school and therapy, haha.....
Then the dark plague that was BCT (biology, cells, and tissues) fell upon me. I was essentially sentenced to a life of sitting and reading about facts and cycles that you can’t draw, but only copy down. I went from being engaged fully (manually, visually, audibly, etc.) to just lecture and notes for the most part. Awful. Just awful. And to make matters worse I felt so swamped by this class I was lost on any way to spare some time to craft, decorate, write, anything. It just didn’t happen for me. And yea I know, you say you could “make time”. Or you’ll think “surely she could have done something for an hour or on the weekend”. Well, no.
Now technically... maybe yes. But also... no. Why? Because it wasn’t just that I was in med school. It was the combination of being in a tougher course (for me) in med school, still figuring out med school, adjusting to a new study and life routine (because no block is or has been the same for me at least), aaaaaand when I did feel as though I had some time I was TIRRRRREDT AF!! And I don’t play around with sleep. AT. ALL. Like I fuqqs with a solid 6.5 hrs, hardt.
*insert hand claps
Anywho, point is rest is not a joke my friends. As a matter of fact, it’s only gotten more serious as time in school goes on, lol. All this to say, it took a while for me to find the balance, which is okay, but you gotta find it. Don’t for one second think that you don’t or won’t need it, or that school trumps your needs/well being. That's dumb. What you enjoy doing, the things that bring you peace are ESSENTIAL! They keep you feeling healthy, refreshed, and motivated! Know what they are and work to keep them present. You will do better in all aspects of life and you will do it happier.
Another thing about being in school, was realizing I’m not just experiencing new this, new that, but I was a new this or that to my environment. That “being a new student” feeling is always the same. I don’t care where or how old you are. The difference that lies in doing it in adulthood, is realizing that no matter where you go or how old you are....people, especially adults are HELLA CHILDISH sometimes. Elitists, cliquish, petty, comical, kind, quiet, whatever. The whole gambit will be present, and you are mistaking if you think at any age you will not manage to run into someone that is too proud, a gossip magazine incarnate, or prefers their peers to look a certain way. That being said you’ll be sure to find the people you like, love, and perhaps can’t imagine life without. But the key to that is patience.
The other key of many keys to acclimating and doing so stress free is authenticity. Keep consistent as much as possible. It’s unrealistic to think you won’t change or be changed by something as you grow, are exposed to more, and all that. But you, your core nature, personality, and spirit function as both an attractant and repellent. And you better...LET IT DO THE WORK! Everyone doesn’t need to be your bestie. Hell, everyone don’t even need to know your last name lol. Now I’m a people person, most know that. I love me some human beings but it’s okay if “Katie” doesn’t want me over for a pregame, her birthday, or doesn’t like to say good morning back to me. Let people do them. It’s hard to be offended by not being someone’s “favorite person” if you aren’t searching for approval. I have to be less concerned about others’ reception of who I am and more concerned with my projection of who I am. I need to be me so I know those around are there cause they chose to be. If not, you’ll go mad. Like actually. Peace will be far from you lol.
This year proved over and over again, that though it may take time to figure out you must: Keep your hobbies, your truest loves. Keep your character, your authenticity. Keep your “Katie” at the preferred distance of his or her choosing. And keep in mind, for any and all situations... that.... it be like that sometimes.
The Third Voice
*disclaimer Katie is not real... like her personality exists in someone we all may know but she is not any of the Katie’s in my life at present.